by Dr. Heléna Kate | Jan 25, 2015 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
We all have flashes of inspiration. Sometimes they appear as quiet whispers in the night, as fleeting thoughts in the morning shower or as huge \”a-ha!\” moments. The question is: Are you giving enough attention to the clues that your inner voice is sending? How can you get more attuned to the inner directives? Here are three ways to get started.
1) Knowledge Is Power
Socrates said it best: \”Know Thyself.\” This includes understanding what makes you feel alive, what captures your imagination, and also what comes naturally to you. Knowing your strengths is a huge advantage. If you have a great sense of humor, creativity or an ability to communicate easily with people, then you can build on those qualities to create your best life. By focusing on enhancing your strengths rather than trying to make up for your weaknesses, you can move more quickly in your desired direction and have fun in the process. Ask a few friends what they see as your strengths, and do the same for them. You may be surprised!
2) Get Into The Flow
Have you ever been so caught up in an activity that the hours fly by in what seemed like minutes? This is called being in a flow state. According to Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, flow can happen when you\’re totally immersed in what you are doing and feeling both serene and connected. This buoyant state can happen many ways, including when deeply focusing on a sport, writing a paper or even playing music. Yoga and mindfulness are reported to increase flow, but it can occur anywhere your skill level is equal to your challenge and you get totally absorbed in the activity. When athletes say they were \”in the zone,\” they are talking about flow. When artists refer to the music, art or inspiration flowing through them, it is the same state. Think of times when you were engrossed in something: your attention was heightened and you felt that everything was aligned. What if you made the choice to make more time for that in your day to day?
For me, yoga is where I experience flow. Although I never set my sights on being a yoga teacher, I noticed (and happened to pay attention to) an ad in the paper about a yoga teacher-training course. After checking into it, I decided to go for it. The course was one of the most fulfilling experiences I have ever taken on – every class was like immersing myself in flow. What are some ways that you can incorporate more flow into your daily life?
3) Embody What You Believe In
Once you know your strengths and where you experience flow, you can consciously tweak your life to include more of that. By stepping into your authenticity, you automatically come into greater alignment and a peace that serves not only yourself but others, as well. Gandhi stated that \”[h]appiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.\” Don\’t underestimate the importance of your own fulfillment and happiness; it ripples out farther than you may know. Rather than rocking the boat by being who you are, you actually give other people permission to do the same. Listen to the clues. By being on the lookout for directives, you will start to see them everywhere.
Steve Jobs has an interesting quote:
\”Your time is limited, so don\’t waste it living someone else\’s life… Don\’t let the noise of others\’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.\”
If you can tap into your intuition and inner wisdom to direct your passions, you can use that in your own life, as well as to serve others. Then, you will easily embody what you believe, and your authentic happiness will shine the way for others, too.
What are you passionate about in your life?
Randy Taran is the founder of Project Happiness, a non-profit that empowers youth to create greater happiness in their lives and in the world. She is the co author, with Maria Lineger, of the Project Happiness Handbook. Programs which grew from the book, make the best of positive psychology, neuroscience and mindfulness accessible nationwide and in over 80 countries.
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Jan 20, 2015 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
I have to be honest about how I typically deal with my distaste for winter – I get the heck out and go somewhere warm! While I will be making some trips to warmer climates this winter, I still try to find ways to be happier and more at peace when I find myself wishing I had three jackets on instead of only one. This – and any situation that makes us uncomfortable – is a great chance to reflect on how to find happiness with what IS rather than seeking to change our situation.
Of course, when we have the power to change our circumstances for the better, I believe we should take it (i.e. hit the beach in some tropical destinations for some fun and sun). But, sometimes what we are experiencing in life is beyond our control –just like the weather. When that is the case, the only thing that we have control over is ourselves – our thoughts, emotions and actions. Here are 5 ways to cultivate happiness in your day to day life, no matter what comes your way.
1. Start Positive – The first few moments of your day make a real imprint on how the rest of it goes. Start with a moment to be quiet, an affirmation, journaling or any other way that helps you start your day centered and focused.
2. Look For It – What you focus on gets bigger. Unfortunately, we often focus on what makes us unhappy rather than the things that make our day better. Make an effort to recognize what is going well and what you do enjoy.
3. Be Clear On What Makes You Happy – This may seem like a no brainer but it is actually something that we overlook. What most brings you pleasure and happiness? Alone time or social time? A good home cooked meal or enjoying take out and a movie? Becoming conscious of the things you most enjoy means that you will choose them more often.
4. Say “Thank You” – Whether it be to yourself, your partner, your child or a co-worker. Express your gratitude for what is working as often as possible. Expressing your appreciation will immediately make you and the other person feel more positive. It also reinforces the liked behavior so that you are more likely to see more of it.
5. Slow Down – Slow down and savor the good parts of your life. Pay attention when you are eating something delicious or really listen when talking to a friend. Or take the time to notice what is around you on your daily walk or drive. The more you can be present with your 5 senses and what you are experiencing, the better.
Life is always a mix of things. No matter how bad a day seems, there is always something there that is positive as well. Using the list above will help you to collect the good out the simple, daily events of your life and can drastically increase your happiness.
What to hear more on this topic? Join Dr. Kate on her weekly radio show Real Answers, Thursdays at 12pm EST. This week she will be further discussing how to find (and stay!) happy in the day to day.
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Dec 9, 2014 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
Last week, my husband and I went to an Aimee Mann show. We’ve seen her perform before, and she was as wonderful as ever.
During that show, I had an epiphany about myself, my sacred work, and my business that I wanted to share with you because the questions it raised and answered are truly VITAL to any business owner out there.
If you aren’t familiar with Aimee Mann, she is a musician who has been around for over 20 years now with a successful and long-term career. Her music is deep and soulful and really full of rich content, melodies, and ideas. She has had a few “bigger” hits, but for the most part her work has received a ton of critical acclaim and a consistent following of loyal fans, without making it to the Top 10 on the charts.
At the show, for whatever reason, I started comparing it to what I imagine a Lady Gaga show would be like:
Aimee wasn’t playing in an arena with thousands of seats. Instead, the theatre held about 500 filled seats and I know she sells out to crowds of about 500 every night of her tour. There weren’t flashy light shows, but instead gorgeous stained-glass windows that were lit up in the theatre. Aimee didn’t have back-up singers or dancers or change outfits 10 times throughout the show. She spoke directly to her audience and told pertinent stories about her life. She joked around with her audience. She put on no pretenses and even came out on stage to play a few songs with her opening act before her set, not worrying that this was some kind of showman’s faux pas.
And then I paused. And I looked around the theatre at the fans that were in a trance with the beauty and power of the show. And I realized something so obvious, yet so important:
Aimee Mann isn’t Lady Gaga, and probably doesn’t want to be.
Meaning: her music simply wouldn’t make sense in a huge arena. It would get lost in there. In this more intimate setting, it was much more powerful. And, it didn’t seem Aimee needed to be in front of more folks or having thousands upon thousands of audience members present. It appeared that everyone at that show was there because they absolutely loved her – they were loyal, devoted fans, not passing audience members momentarily getting sucked into big name hits. It was clear she was delivering so much value in that evening, and she loved doing it.
And that realization brought me to an even deeper one: When it comes to my own business, I have a choice about what I want. My choice is to be more like Aimee Mann than Lady Gaga.
My work is deep and powerful and intimate, and right now it fits better in a “theatre” than in a “stadium”. I’m not interested in droves of strangers unfamiliar with me and my work being in the room. I prefer a loyal following of engaged women who really want to do the work and really resonate with my message. I’m interested in long-term relationships with my clients instead of temporary fans, and I am committed to being myself and showing up authentically, without any pretenses, no matter what.
I admit, it’s sometimes easy to get lured into the image of being a larger-than-life superstar, to think I want a flashy business with a million followers. But when I really connect in to my heart and soul and what I want for myself, my work and my personal life, it’s so clear to me that being a “larger-than-life” super-coach guru isn’t my calling. At least not for right now. ☺
That doesn’t mean that I don’t strive to create more or more visibility. Of course I do. But I do it knowing where I fit best, how I serve best, and being in control of how I want my business & life to look instead of an empty longing for a stardom that doesn’t really suit me.
Now, I’m not saying that Aimee Mann is better than Lady Gaga. Not by a long shot.
What I’m saying is that it is so valuable to get clear on who you are and who you want to be, and live by that. If you reach into your heart and find that you truly are a Lady Gaga, then YAY! Strive for that and go for it.
But if you reach into your heart and find that you’re an Aimee Mann or a Madeleine Peyroux or a street performer or anything else – EMBRACE it. Love it. Take joy and pleasure in knowing that you know who you are and set goals that reflect it. Don’t blindly yearn or strive for the biggest or grandest business ever just because you’ve been told that’s what’s best.
Know yourself. Be yourself. Appreciate all the diversity and paths that are available. And take pleasure in who you are.
Joanna Lindenbaum is the founder of Soulful Coaching for busy women. She believes with every fiber in my being that women have the power to transform the world. Because of this, she coaches busy women who are looking to nourish their creativity and take their lives to the next level.
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Jul 27, 2014 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
What does it mean to be on your path? What does it mean to have a sense of deep purpose? A person who is connected to their life\’s intentions does not do good because of sheer willpower. They do it through a combination of humility and faith connected to something beyond just themselves … they hitch their wagon to a higher meaning, which is a power more powerful than self-will.
Such a person is at ease with the essential goodness of life in spite of in the tumult of daily life, with all it\’s burdens and setbacks, because they have connected the spark of goodness in themselves with the universal goodness inherent in every atom or creation.
Such people become a Gandhi or a Nelson Mandela or a Rosa Parks or YOU. This is the soil on which greatness gives birth.
reblogged from quora.com
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Nov 6, 2013 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
Whether you are an artist or an entrepreneur, it can be easy to fall into a groove and forget to play, explore and push your own edges. When this happens things tend to go a bit flat and we become bored, frustrated or half-hearted in our efforts. We loose the creativity and spontaneity that fosters success.
So when things get a bit grey, here are a few simple practices to inject some beauty and wonder into your life. You might be amazed at how taking the time to do one or more of these will allow you to return to your work with more focus, love and genius.
1. Take a walk. Look for new streets to go down. Extra points if it is dawn, dusk or late at night or if there is inclement weather. Go farther then you expected and suddenly your muse may join you. Listen to her conversation in the patterns of your thoughts and the things you notice as you go.
2. Leave an offering. A bottle cap with an owl on it, a human figure built of out twist ties, a flower, a quartz point, a scrap of paper that says “Please visit, I miss you.” Leave your offering somewhere where you know your muse likes to hang out when she is playing hooky from your studio or office.
3. Read poetry out loud. My favorites include “Demasiado Nombres” by Pablo Neruda and “Sunflower Sutra” by Ginsberg, but you know what your muse likes.
4. Set the mood. Sweep the floor, clear your work area and light some incense or a candle. Let your muse know you are expecting her.
5. Be unpredictable. Change up the hours you are working, stay later then you normally do or start at dawn. Surprise her by being there when she least expects it – it seems to please her.
K Lenore Siner is an artist and associate coach with Dr. Kate
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