Commitment on the Spiritual Path: My Journey from Survival to Devotion

Commitment on the Spiritual Path: My Journey from Survival to Devotion

Commitment on the Spiritual Path: My Journey from Survival to Devotion

For a long time, I lived under the belief that to create the life I wanted, I needed to simply work harder. It didn’t matter how depleted I became; the formula seemed clear: the more I pushed, the more I produced. And so I pushed. Less sleep. Long hours. Meals skipped so I could squeeze in more work. There was a fierce determination that kept me going, but also a quiet erosion happening underneath it all.

I began my adult life with a trial by fire — no resources, no clear direction, and a baby in my arms. In those early years, hard work was not just a habit; it was survival. It was the thing that allowed me to build a business, finish my education, and create a foundation for myself and my child. And for a while, it worked. Hard work got results.

But there was a shadow side to this commitment. I had unknowingly linked my worth to output and my security to sacrifice. Somewhere along the way I internalized the belief that depletion was required in order to succeed, that the road to any meaningful accomplishment had to be paved with this depletion.

When Commitment Becomes a Cage

The thing about survival patterns is that they work — until they don’t. At first, my version of commitment carried me. But eventually, it began to hollow me out. I became brittle. My patience wore thin. I noticed I wasn’t enjoying the people I usually enjoyed. My body was frail and tired, and with that fatigue came poor decisions and errors in judgment.

I was, in many ways, “committed” — but it was a distorted commitment. It was a commitment born of fear: the fear of losing ground, the fear of not being enough, the fear of what would happen if I stopped. It was commitment as compulsion, not devotion.

And then, like many of us who push too far, I hit a wall. I found myself cracking under the weight of it all. For the first time, my old way of doing things wasn’t working. I had to face the truth: my relationship with commitment needed to be transformed.

The Opposite Pole

After decades of working in one way, I decided to take the advice of those around me and “be normal”—to finish work by 6pm, take weekends off, and pursue the more common pleasures of life. At first, this was difficult, but eventually it became routine. Yet, I did not feel more content. I felt more aimless, more self-indulgent, more dissatisfied. I had no desire to live a life of indulgence. Once again, I found myself at a dead end.

A New Understanding of Commitment

Life, in its wisdom, brought me both support and challenge to shift into a new way of being. I received enough help to keep me afloat — but also enough resistance to push me deeper. Slowly, I began to understand that it was not commitment itself that mattered, but what the commitment was to.

True commitment is not about endurance for its own sake. It is devotion to what nourishes and sustains, to what aligns us with our highest truth. It is about choosing again and again to align with what matters most — even when it is inconvenient, even when misunderstood, even when it asks us to release old ways of being.

Commitment, I realized, is an act of love.

The Feminine Force Within

As I looked deeper, I noticed that my distorted relationship with commitment wasn’t only personal — it was cultural. I had learned to survive by doing rather than being, by measuring my value through appearance rather than inner beauty, by caring for others while neglecting myself. Like many of us, I had been taught to suppress the feminine force within — the wisdom of the body, the power of receptivity, the right to be nourished.

What emerged was a new vision: commitment as a sacred balance of the masculine and feminine within. It is the focus and strength to act, yes — but also the willingness to listen inwardly, to rest, to be guided by spirit.

Commitment as Devotion

Now I see commitment not as a rigid vow to grind through life, but as ongoing devotion to my soul’s truth. It is choosing alignment over approval, integrity over exhaustion, devotion over compulsion.

Sometimes this devotion looks like saying yes to a big leap of faith. Other times it looks like saying no to what drains me. More often, it is the steady tending of the inner fire — the quiet acts of realignment with the truth of my heart.

Commitment is not about force; it is about fidelity. It is less about gripping tightly and more about returning, again and again, to what matters most.

An Invitation

If you find yourself caught in the old paradigm of commitment — where sacrifice, depletion, and fear are the drivers — I invite you to pause. Ask yourself:

What am I truly committed to?
Is it survival? Approval? Or is it the deeper call of your soul?

Commitment can be an expression of love rather than fear, a path of devotion rather than depletion. It invites us to align, to listen, to return to ourselves again and again. And when we do, commitment ceases to be a cage — it becomes a source of freedom, vitality, and spiritual strength.

Want to learn more about transforming commitment in your own life? Listen to the Podcast : EP 8 The Alchemy of Commitment — Devotion, Discipline, and Transformation 

The Transformative Power of Gratitude: 6 Practices That Help Heal Anxiety and Depression

The Transformative Power of Gratitude: 6 Practices That Help Heal Anxiety and Depression

The Transformative Power of Gratitude: 6 Practices That Help Heal Anxiety and Depression

Gratitude and appreciation are two of the most powerful tools we can use to transform anxiety and depression. They ground us in the present, uplift our perspective, and activate healing from the inside out.

As Dan Baker writes in What Happy People Know, “It is impossible to be in a state of appreciation and fear at the same time.” The same holds true for worry, judgment, and even grief. Gratitude doesn’t bypass hard emotions—it softens them and makes space for joy to return.

Here are six intentional practices to cultivate gratitude and create a deeper sense of peace and emotional well-being:

1. Keep a Gratitude Journal

Research from psychologists like Sonja Lyubomirsky shows that writing down what we’re grateful for—once a week or even just when inspired—can increase our energy, reduce stress, and support emotional regulation.

Try this: At the end of each day, write down three “small joys.” Think simple: the warmth of a mug in your hands, your child’s laughter, a quiet moment with a tree. These fleeting gifts, when acknowledged, start to shape a life that feels more full and sacred.

2. Speak the Language of Positivity

Words have energy. In Words Can Change Your Brain, authors Andrew Newberg, M.D. and Mark Robert Waldman found that positive words like “peace,” “hope,” and “love” activate neural pathways that reduce stress and build resilience.

Integrating affirming language into your daily life—both spoken and internal—literally rewires your brain toward higher function and deeper calm.

Try this: Choose one word each morning to anchor your day (e.g., “grace,” “truth,” “compassion”).

3. Remember the Helpers

Gratitude is often described as the “memory of the heart.” Think back to those who helped you when you were struggling—mentors, friends, family, even strangers.

Make a habit of reflecting on these moments. Let the memory of someone’s kindness open your heart. If you’re moved, reach out and let them know they made a difference.

4. Write Thank-You Letters

According to gratitude researcher Robert Emmons, writing thank-you letters—even just once—has measurable mental health benefits. The impact is even greater when the letter is shared aloud.

Choose someone who has touched your life—especially someone you may not have fully thanked. A few heartfelt words can ripple far beyond what you imagine.

5. Surround Yourself with Grateful People

Energy is contagious. The people you spend time with influence your thoughts and emotional habits. Spend time with those who speak words of appreciation, who find beauty in the everyday, who say “thank you” and mean it.

Their gratitude will rub off on you—and yours will uplift them in return.

6. Give Back with Purpose

Gratitude naturally evolves into generosity. One of the most beautiful ways to honor those who’ve supported you is to pay it forward—to lift someone else just as you were lifted.

This doesn’t mean forced reciprocity. It means choosing to become a light for someone else, simply because your light was once rekindled by another.

Try this: Ask, “Where am I being called to serve in a way that feels aligned, authentic, and soul-fulfilling?”

Closing Reflection

Gratitude isn’t a spiritual bypass. It’s a spiritual anchor. It helps us return to what is sacred and true—even in the middle of life’s storms. It reminds us that healing is not a destination, but a devotion to seeing what is already good.

Practice gratitude not to feel perfect, but to feel whole.

The Shadow Side of Awakening: How Spiritual Practices Can Keep Us Stuck

The Shadow Side of Awakening: How Spiritual Practices Can Keep Us Stuck

The Shadow Side of Awakening: How Spiritual Practices Can Keep Us Stuck

Spirituality is often painted in light—breakthroughs, beauty, and bliss. But the real work of spiritual evolution is rarely so clean. Beneath the surface of sacred rituals and intentional practices lies the potential for avoidance, resistance, and even self-deception. This is where the concept of spiritual bypassing becomes essential.

Spiritual bypassing is when spiritual tools are used to escape rather than engage—to look enlightened without doing the shadow work that true evolution requires. It might sound like wisdom but really masks fear. It might look like growth but is often about staying safe, separate, and in control.

I’ve been there. On the surface, I was deeply engaged in spiritual practices—studying, teaching, holding rituals—but, in hindsight, much of it was a sophisticated form of avoidance. I was avoiding intimacy, responsibility, and the deeper call that scared me. If I, someone deeply committed to the work, could fall into bypassing, then it can happen to any of us.

The trickiest part? The ego gets smarter. The more you grow, the more refined its tactics become. You might even believe you’re on track, all while subtly sidestepping the discomforts that real transformation demands.

This isn’t about shame or blame. It’s about bringing curiosity and compassion to your process. Ask yourself: Am I using this practice to connect more deeply with life or to retreat from it?

True spiritual work is less about transcending life and more about entering it fully—even the parts we’d rather skip. When your rituals start to disconnect you from your body, your relationships, or your humanity, they are no longer tools of awakening. They are shields against it.

Let this be your reminder: Growth doesn’t always look graceful. But facing your shadow is part of what brings the light in.

The Real Secret to Unshakable Self-Confidence

The Real Secret to Unshakable Self-Confidence

The Real Secret to Unshakable Self-Confidence

We tend to think of self-confidence as something you’re either born with or endlessly chasing. One moment it’s there, the next it’s vanished—especially when faced with rejection, challenge, or uncertainty. Wouldn’t it be nice if confidence came in a capsule we could take each morning?

Here’s the good news: There is a powerful way to build real self-confidence—and it doesn’t rely on perfect circumstances or the approval of others. The foundation of authentic self-confidence is self-awareness. When you’re connected to who you are and aligned with your truth, confidence becomes a natural byproduct.

Let’s break it down into four essential practices:

1. Know Yourself

We can’t change what we don’t notice.
Self-confidence begins by tuning in to your internal landscape—your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.

  • What are you thinking throughout the day?
  • Are your thoughts supportive or self-critical?
  • What feelings arise in different situations, and how do you respond?
  • How do you spend your time—and are those actions aligned with your values and desires?

Try carrying a small journal for a few days. Write down recurring thoughts, emotional patterns, and how you’re spending your time. What you notice will reveal the raw material for transformation.

2. Understand Yourself

Awareness is the first step. Understanding is where real growth happens.
Once you start observing your patterns, dig deeper:

  • Where did those critical thoughts begin?
  • Whose voice are you hearing in your head?
  • What beliefs or past experiences are shaping your behavior?

Understanding yourself requires compassion and curiosity. Your emotions—especially the uncomfortable ones—carry messages. When you feel anxious, angry, or sad, ask: What unmet need or past hurt is surfacing right now?

Also reflect on how you use your time. Are there patterns of avoidance or overwork that block your growth? What do you need—resources, rest, structure—to make new choices?

3. Accept Yourself

Self-acceptance is where the inner war softens.
When you stop fighting who you are and start meeting yourself with grace, everything shifts.

You don’t need to be perfect. You just need to be honest. Speak to yourself with compassion. Interrupt negative inner dialogue with affirmations that remind you of your worth. Let emotions rise and move through without shame. And when you make mistakes—as we all do—choose reflection over judgment.

Create balance in your actions: nourish your body, pursue meaningful goals, and leave room for joy. Celebrate your wins. Rest when you’re tired. Forgive yourself when you stumble. That’s how self-respect grows.

4. Love Yourself

When acceptance becomes love, you become unstoppable.
Loving yourself isn’t indulgent—it’s liberating. It shifts your inner dialogue. It fuels your actions. It elevates your life.

Love yourself enough to speak kindly to your mind. Love yourself enough to feel your feelings without shame. Love yourself enough to follow through on your dreams.

As you begin to like yourself, something deeper awakens. You realize you’re not just tolerating your life—you’re thriving in it. And that’s when confidence becomes second nature.

Here’s the truth:

When you know yourself,
When you understand yourself,
When you accept yourself,
When you truly love yourself—
Confidence is no longer something you chase. It’s something you embody.

Make these four steps part of your daily rhythm. Reflect. Breathe. Recenter. Repeat. Over time, you’ll notice a profound shift—not just in how you feel about yourself, but in how you show up for your life.

Reinventing Yourself After a Breakup: 8 Soulful Steps to Reclaim Your Life

Reinventing Yourself After a Breakup: 8 Soulful Steps to Reclaim Your Life

Reinventing Yourself After a Breakup: 8 Soulful Steps to Reclaim Your Life

Breakups have a way of unraveling us.

Whether the ending came as a shock or was long overdue, whether it was mutual or deeply one-sided, the result is often the same—you find yourself standing in the wreckage of a life you no longer recognize. The rituals that brought comfort, the daily exchanges that tethered you to joy, even the future you imagined… all of it gone.

Even when you know it was the right thing, even when you’re strong and independent, a breakup can leave you questioning everything—including who you are now.

But here’s the truth: reinventing yourself after a breakup isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about remembering who you are, reclaiming your wholeness, and stepping into a version of you that’s even more aligned with your soul.

Here’s how to begin that sacred process of returning to your singular self.

1. Let Go of Loose Ends

Love lives in the details. So does grief.


It’s easy to keep turning over shared memories, future plans, or holding onto physical reminders of the relationship. But healing needs space. Make it a ritual: release what no longer serves, from items in your home to dreams that no longer fit. As you do, you’re making space for a life that’s yours—entirely and unapologetically.

2. Make Space for Fun (Even If It Feels Frivolous)

That warning light on your dashboard? It matters.

When your heart is heavy, joy may feel far away. But laughter, silliness, and new experiences help reset your nervous system and reconnect you to life.


Say yes to the little adventures. Paint for no reason. Dance in your kitchen. Book that solo weekend trip. These moments aren’t distractions—they’re medicine.

3. Choose How You Want to Show Up

After a breakup, it’s easy to let the confusion spill over into how you present yourself to the world. But this is your moment to reclaim your reflection.

This isn’t about performing for others. It’s about choosing your energy, your expression, and remembering that your outer world can reflect your inner healing. Wear what feels like a yes. Move your body. Adorn yourself in a way that affirms your essence.

 

Every small act of kindness softens the edges of the world—and your inner world, too. Being gentle with yourself in difficult moments isn’t indulgent—it’s healing.

4. Pay Attention to What Actually Feels Good

Not what used to feel good. Not what your ex liked. Not what you’re “supposed” to enjoy. Just—what feels good now?

The simple act of noticing how you feel throughout your day is a profound act of self-awareness. It’s how you start building a new life that’s actually aligned with who you are becoming.

5. Be Around People Who Truly See You

There’s a particular kind of healing that happens when you’re with people who love the real you—not the you you were in the relationship, not the you who’s trying to “get over it,” but the true you beneath all of it.

Surround yourself with the ones who remind you of your light. Their love will anchor you as you begin to evolve again.

6. Spend Meaningful Time Alone

There’s sacred wisdom in solitude. After a breakup, alone time isn’t about isolation—it’s about restoration.

Let yourself be still. Let the grief move. Let your intuition speak. Light a candle, take long walks, write out your thoughts, cry when you need to. The next version of you is being woven in this quiet space.

7. Rekindle Your Dreams

Every relationship shapes us. Sometimes that means parts of our own dreams get tucked away to make room for someone else’s.

Now is the time to call those dreams back. Dust off the parts of yourself that got quiet. Begin to imagine new possibilities. Your heart has more chapters to write.

8. Stop Looking Over Your Shoulder

There’s wisdom in reflection—but there’s also a time to turn the page.

Once the grieving has softened and you’ve honored what was, make a conscious choice to stop circling the past. That version of you no longer needs to be your point of reference. The next version? He/She’s waiting just ahead.

Reinventing yourself after a breakup isn’t about fixing what’s broken. It’s about returning to yourself with deeper love, clearer truth, and renewed vision. Let this be your turning point. The end of something doesn’t mean you’ve failed—it means you’re being invited into something new.

And you get to decide what that becomes.

Resistance Is Not Discernment: Signs You Might Be Avoiding Growth

Resistance Is Not Discernment: Signs You Might Be Avoiding Growth

Resistance Is Not Discernment: Signs You Might Be Avoiding Growth

One of the most misleading detours on the spiritual path is confusing resistance with discernment. The former is fear; the latter is wisdom. But the ego is clever. It will convince you that your refusal is clarity, when really it’s just comfort speaking.

During a period of intense spiritual practice, I found myself deeply invested in one system. I gave it everything: time, devotion, and trust. But something wasn’t right. I began resisting other teachings, other voices. Not out of discernment, but out of a need to protect what I had built my identity around.

If a new teaching provokes a strong emotional reaction, that’s a moment worth examining. Not all discomfort is a sign to walk away. Sometimes it’s a sign to lean in.

Ask yourself:

  • Do I feel the need to invalidate another path to validate my own?
  • Am I shutting out teachings that challenge my beliefs?
  • Do I feel triggered when someone offers me a different lens?

These are signs of resistance, not discernment. When you’re truly aligned, you can say “no thank you” with grace, not judgment. But if you need to make something or someone else wrong, chances are you’re avoiding your own edge.

Resistance often shows up when we’re about to grow. It’s a last-ditch effort by the ego to keep the status quo. And spiritual ego is the most slippery kind of all—because it uses light-filled language to avoid doing the real work.

To deepen on your path, you must be willing to let go of even your most beloved tools and identities. It isn’t about abandoning what works. It’s about surrendering the attachments that keep you from growing.