by Dr. Heléna Kate | Dec 10, 2013 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
One of the things that seems to get everyone in their business /life from time to time is rejection. You need to put yourself out there so many times. You need to hear \”No\” more than you hear \”Yes\”.
Suzanne Evans said recently that if you cant tolerate hearing \”No\” you shouldn\’t be running your own business. Getting used to rejection is an important part of staying on track in your business and your life.
Rejection comes in all shapes and sizes: client rejection, colleague rejection, job rejection, relationship rejection. Any time that a door closes we can call that a rejection. Here are some keys to how to take a lickin’ and keep on tickin’.
Cultivate self love: We need to be able to hold on to our value even when other people do not see it. We are best able to do this if we practice regular love and kindness toward ourselves. If you do not treat yourself fabulously, find a simple way to start and keep developing it.
When a door closes…: Yup. The reframe. I really believe that we are guided and that when a road gets blocked off it is to move us in the direction that we need to go. Do your absolute best and surrender to the outcome.
Sometimes this can get confusing. We can’t tell the difference between when we should persist and when we should throw in the towel. Learn to listen to your gut and your head and remember it is IMPOSSIBLE to make a wrong choice. There is no such thing.
Gather your support: You really can’t do it alone. Know the people who love you and show up regularly to give and receive love. There is nothing that will strengthen you more than the love and support of people who believe in you.
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Dec 8, 2013 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
Today\’s tip: what to do on super-slow days.
Once in a while there are these days when loading the dishwasher is the most productive thing I can manage. (It may or may not happen on a verge of a big project I\’ve never tried before). Forget writing curriculum, planning workshops, or catching up on back-end stuff. I don\’t trust myself to do anything of consequence. In the past such days triggered an unpleasant mix of guilt and \”I\’m-a-failed-entrepreneur\” fear. Fun times.
Now… here is a simple strategy to a) make these days productive, and b) earn the bonus of avoiding guilt and self-bashing: Read. A book.
Most entrepreneurs have a list of books they plan to read \”someday\”. Well, that day is today. You can\’t sit yourself down and brainstorm, because you\’re too exhausted/scared/waiting for information/whatever. You don\’t trust yourself to do behind-the-scenes work for a client for the same reasons. You can barely tolerate the thought of interacting with another human being.
Time to sit down, make yourself a cup of coffee and open one of the better-written books on your list.
Don\’t rush into performing the exercises if the book offers any, as they often do. You\’ll have time for that later. Relax and read.
Soak the ideas. Get some validation for stuff you already know. It\’ll surface later when you network, teach, launch.
It\’s time well spent. Or rather, well-invested.
A smooth running, successful business is within your reach and Marina Darlow of Vision Framework can help you get there with systems for time management, cash flow, project plans and more.
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Dec 5, 2013 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
I swear I have a little gremlin inside that pokes me every time I don\’t get the results I want. And with this poke, all of a sudden I am back in grade school wondering why I was never the first person picked for anything.
Crazy! And common! All in one package. Funny thing is — or not so funny — people believe they are \”not supposed to\” feel this way. I am not saying we should just take this interior abuse. I am just saying we should stop trying to hide from it.
We are social animals and have developed biologically to care what others think. The people who tell you they are totally over this are either enlightened or lying.
The likelihood that we are going to entirely escape this emotional jab to the ribs is slim. However, there are potential solutions that makes this more bearable. I am going to give you three.
- Surround yourself with good people.
- Love what you do.
- Stay in integrity with yourself.
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Dec 3, 2013 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
A recent study shows that only one out of every three Americans is actually happy. On a list of the top 20 happiest countries in the world, America just barely ranks at #17. This is kind of ridiculous when you think about all the freedoms and conveniences Americans enjoy that less wealthy nations will never experience. Even if you are not happy, it is likely you know someone who is. Think about how much you adore them and why. Observe them closely for a while and you might notice a surprising amount of room for growth in your own habits. Here are some of the things happy people do to make life better for everyone around them.
They Are Nice
It might seem like an overly general term, but happy people are usually nice. They are well-liked and pleasant to be around. They are respectful, warm, considerate, and helpful. They don’t get jealous. They don’t waste time gossiping and complaining. They seem to have infinite patience and give freely of themselves. Traits like these can only stem from a deep-seated sense of contentedness. Nice people create a social climate that puts everyone else at ease.
They Are Honest
True happiness cannot coexist with lies. Those who lie to themselves are more likely to lie to others and struggle with unhealthy relationships. Honesty starts with an informed sense of self. Happy people know who they are and aren’t afraid to show it. They are consistently themselves and do not feel the need to wear masks or pretend to be something they are not for any reason. Life is a lot less complicated when you allow yourself to be the same person at all times. By letting go of lies, happy people set an inspiring example which encourages those around them to flourish.
They Are Cooperative
Happy people are not overly concerned with dominating, yet they tend to come out on top. Victory is meaningless to the happy person without a team to share in the glory. There is a reason why it is customary for people who win awards to stand up and give a speech about all the people who helped them along the way. It is because nobody gets there alone, and taking all the credit for yourself is just mean. The idea of winning or dominating denotes pushing other people down on your way to the top. Those who recognize the efforts of others and freely share the joys of success tend to live much happier lives.
They Have Beautiful Smiles
There is a huge difference between smiling for the camera and smiling as a function of happiness. Anyone can show their teeth. Happy people smile with their entire bodies, and sometimes with all the energy in a one-foot radius. A real smile cannot be faked. When you run around emanating a radiant glow in response to all the joys of life, you are bound to attract some admirers.
They Are Well Adjusted
Happy people revel in life’s small pleasures. This gives them access to sources of joy that pass most people by. At the same time, they don’t get bogged down by the petty little details that seem to keep plenty of others stuck in the dumps. They know what is worth savoring and what to disregard. Happy people have a rational sense of scale to keep them grounded. The resulting positive perspective can turn any problem into an opportunity for growth.
They Surround Themselves with Happy People
Whether they actively seek out other folks with similar habits or they have the effect of raising the positive charge everywhere they go, happy people do not often stand alone. Glee is contagious. Groups of people tend to observe each other and subsequently imitate the most attractive behaviors they find in those around them. If enough folks agree to treat each other the way they would like to be treated, the result will be infectious and irresistible to bystanders.
They Are Spontaneous
A good relationship with the value of each passing moment is an essential component of happiness. If living in the present is so easy to do, why is it so many people are preoccupied with thoughts of the elsewhere, the future, and the past? Happy people are comfortable in their skin. They are content and aware in whatever moment they inhabit. This allows them to see opportunities for fun and adventure which others might overlook. It is part of why happy people are always the life of the party.
They Are Good Listeners
Communication is about more than just barking a bunch of orders and wondering why nobody is listening. Harmony cannot exist in a vacuum. Can you imagine trying to sing in a barbershop quartet without being able to hear the other singers? In order to create a resonating chord, you must listen to what is happening around you and find just the right place for your own vibrations.
Happy people are always looking for new perspectives as a way of informing their own. The feelings of others matter deeply to them because they know the greater good involves far more than just their own desires. Happy people have made a lifelong commitment to constantly learning, and they know the only way to do this is to be quiet and listen.
They Expect Less
It stands to reason that if you expect less, you will be satisfied with less. This mindset allows a more sustainable and unmaterialistic approach to life. Those who focus on what others should be doing for them are often disappointed more often than they are satisfied. True happiness comes from within, not from deeds or objects originating outside the self. Happy people know this, and they expect more from themselves than they do from external sources. They are more likely to accept than to demand, simply because a state of acceptance is a much healthier place to be than one of constant unmet demands.
They Don’t Judge
Nobody likes being judged. This is because the majority of judgments we make about each other are false and misinformed. Happy people understand through their own experiences that life is a perpetual learning process and everything we go through changes us in some way. With this knowledge, it just doesn’t make sense to hold a bunch of grudges. Happy people accept that we all struggle with different weaknesses, and everyone has the potential to figure things out in due time. This makes happy people better and more patient companions than those who are always judging others for their weaknesses.
The road to happiness is not an easy one to travel. It requires a sense of humble honesty which does not come naturally to everyone. Happy people are popular and successful for a reason. Anyone who smiles that much has got to be doing something right. It’s time you realized how much you have to learn from them. Happy people do not want you to be jealous. They want you to share in their joy by opening yourself up to the lessons all around you. They want to learn from you while inspiring you with their example. This is why we love happy people, and the world would probably stop turning without them. Hug your local happy person today. Let them take you by the hand and lead you toward a better life.
reblogged from www.lifehack.org
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Nov 28, 2013 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
Q:Why do you believe that having a business coach or mentor is important? How have they helped you?
Having a coach or mentor is really important because they are an independent sounding board with business experience and great wisdom. A coach is not a consultant who comes into your business and tells you what to do or does it for you. Rather, a coach spends time listening to where you’re at in your business and then initiates discussions to facilitate problem solving and strategic planning.
This concept was a little hard to get my head around at first, I couldn’t believe that I was paying a lot of money to do all the work myself. However, the ‘coaching’ technique is definitely invaluable because it is not the quick fix that many consultants who come in and out of your business in a hurry usually provide. Instead,
When I started my business I was definitely an experienced electrician but I had no real idea about running a business. Eighteen months along and working almost 90 hours a week, I employed the services of a business coach and have never looked back.
The best thing about a coach or mentor is that they keep you accountable to your vision. Often as a small business owner you can get caught working in your business and not spending enough time working on it and moving toward your business goals. Having weekly or even fortnightly meetings with a coach forces you to take a few hours out to specifically think about your business and where it’s heading.
Although taking this time out is extremely important, small business owners often say they are too busy and don’t prioritize it. This is dangerous and small business owners often don’t meet their goals because they don’t spend enough time strategically planning. This is where coaches keep you accountable and regularly challenge you on your progress.
I have also found that having a coach can stop you from learning the hard way and making big mistakes. Because I have listened to the words of wisdom of other people, it has allowed me to progress quickly without too many deterrents as a result of making wrong choices.
Joshua Nicholls is the owner of Platinum Electrical Contractors, which in just four years has experienced a growth of 790%. From it’s humble beginnings, Platinum Electrical has now grown to have over 30 employees and has been a finalist and won many small business awards.
reblogged from www.businessblueprint.com.au
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