by Dr. Heléna Kate | Feb 19, 2014 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
Failure is such a negative word that it seems strange to suggest that it can be a good thing. How many times have you looked back on your life, thought of mistakes you’ve made, and kicked yourself over them? I know I sure have. I have had many failures in my life. I have lost a job; I have mismanaged my money; and I have had trouble in relationships. But life goes on as it should.
You see many people allow failure to hold them back, when in reality failure can be a good thing! Fear of failure prevents many people from following their dreams or having a go at something new. Fear of failing is failure in itself because it holds back so many would-be success stories. I often remember what Zig Ziglar once said, “Failure is an event, not a person.” How profound is that?!
History has shown that the most successful exploits frequently came on the back of failure. Just think of Winston Churchill. He failed the sixth grade and was defeated in every single election for public office until he became Prime Minister at the young age of 62. Or, how about Albert Einstein. He did not speak until he was four years old, and couldn’t read until he was seven. His parents thought he was “sub-normal.” He was expelled from school and his teachers described him as “mentally slow, unsociable and adrip forever in foolish dreams.” You see where I am going with this. Failure is actually on our side. Failing allows us to grow, learn, and find new opportunities. Here is what I mean:
- Failure means you have courage Even though you didn’t get the results you wanted, at least you were trying to do something. So many people let the fear of failure prevent them from reaching for their dreams. So don’t be worried about a failure – at least you had the courage to have a go. Courage is not the absence of fear; it is feeling the fear and taking action anyway. When you have a go, despite the possibility of failure, you show that you have great courage.
- Failure makes you stronger When you don’t get the result you want, you can become more determined to succeed. At first you probably feel discouraged, frustrated or upset but these feelings don’t last forever. You then get a burst of determination and strength of purpose to try again. Failure makes you more focused on a successful outcome next time.
- Failure helps you learn It was Thomas Edison who said that he hadn’t failed in his hundreds of attempts to create the light bulb. His answer when questioned about his ‘failures’ was that he hadn’t failed, he had just found hundreds of ways that it didn’t work. This is the mentality of geniuses and successful people. Failure to get the results you wanted is not a negative thing; it is simply an opportunity to try a different method. It is also the opportunity to start again.
- Failure helps you grow When your efforts don’t work out, you have to reach deep inside to find the strength to try again. To solve the problem and make sure you get the desired result, you need to extend yourself and so you grow. You need to stretch and possibly move outside your comfort zone. After experiencing failure, you will never be the same as you were before you tried. You don’t know how far you can go until you have tried and failed.
- Failure creates new opportunities Many people believe that everything happens for a reason, we just don’t know what it is at the time. Failures often bring unforeseen opportunities that would not have been available without the failure in the first place. You often need to close one door so that another door of opportunity can be opened for you. Failure is a way of one door closing. Failure is seldom the end; it is often a bright beginning.
- Failure provides answers If you don’t try and fail, you will never know if your idea or method is going to work. You spend time worrying that you don’t have the answer; you wonder whether it would have worked. The pain of regret is far worse than the pain of failure. When you fail, you can start again; with regret, you will never know.
- Failure gives you the best chance of success Research out of Stanford University has shown that those who are the top of their field are the ones who have failed the most. Having to persevere to learn a new skill gives you the advantage over someone who gets it right first time. Learning many ways how not to do it gives you the edge over the person who hasn’t have that experience.
Don’t view failure as bad luck, instead look at each attempt to reach your goals as a triumph. There’s always something to learn, ways to grow, different viewpoints to see, and new opportunities waiting just around the corner. So get in and have a go. Fail fast and recover quickly to try again. Use every failure as an opportunity to learn and to grow as a person. Remember that every failure is like one step on the stairway to success. Above all else, remember this: If you never fail, you will never succeed.
reblogged from http://prairieecothrifter.com/
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Jan 25, 2014 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
The time has come to write. I feel this on an almost cellular level. Why? Because I\’m sitting in my writing chair, wearing my writing glasses, chewing my writing gum. Now, I could sit in this chair, wear these glasses, and chew this gum while knitting tea cozies, juggling jelly beans, and husking corn (just not at the same time). But I wouldn\’t. See, I write at home, and I\’ve learned the hard way that unless I strictly divide my writing time from everything else, my work bleeds into my home life. Then I can never relax, because, just like an ax murderer in a horror movie, my work is always lurking.
These days almost all of us work at home to some extent. Maybe you spend evenings brooding over spreadsheets from the office. Maybe you\’re in the house all day doing the hardest work imaginable: caring for the young, the old, or the ill. Or maybe, like me, you have a job—sort of—but no official physical workplace. All of which is to say that when I talk about \”home\” versus \”work,\” I mean the activities that replenish your energy versus the ones that drain it. In an age when bleed-through is the new normal, it\’s more crucial than ever to separate the two. Here are some strategies that help me.
1. Establish a replenishing inner \”state of home.\”
Some people spend years in an office cubicle without ever feeling the energetic involvement of real work; others do brilliant, inspired work without ever leaving their bed. This is because both work and home are first and foremost states of mind. So to begin separating your work life and home life, we\’ll concentrate on creating a mental \”state of home\” inside your head.
To do this, focus on memories that feel relaxing, nourishing, replenishing—in a word, homey. Remember baking with your grandmother, or talking with your sister, or snuggling in bed with a loved one (fabulous sex is an excellent way to feel at home, as is cuddling with your beloved collie—just not at the same time).
If you don\’t have many homey memories, your mental state of home may feel tepid at first. Persist! Remember the most comforting times and places you can: the branches of the tall tree where bullies couldn\’t reach you, Uncle Joe\’s bomb shelter, the warmest corner of the prison yard. (Ideally, you\’re looking for a sense of joyful replenishment, but happy relaxation is nearly as good, pleasant neutrality will do, familiar boredom is better than nothing, and defensible concealment—well, you get the idea.)
Once you come up with three memories that qualify, hold in mind the feelings they bring, while silently repeating, \”Home. Home. Home.\”
Read step two in tomorrow\’s!
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Jan 23, 2014 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
You have 1440 minutes between right now and this time tomorrow. Only 1440 minutes. How will you use that time? One percent of that time is about 15 minutes. What, you ask, is so important about 15 minutes? It is a block of time that\’s small enough to make room for and large enough to get something significant done.
My most important strategy to get more done every day is simply to always be ready. When you are ready, you have what you need when you need it. This means you can use \”found time\” productively to move your business forward.
I can hear you asking: \”What is \’found time\’\”? Have you ever been to a meeting that didn\’t start when planned? Far too many meetings start several minutes late. When you are ready to use those \”found\” 15 minutes, you can effectively make a dent in all you need to get done each day.
For example, when I have magazine articles I want to read, I tear them out of my magazines and carry them with me for a day or two. Then when — not if — \”found time\” appears, I use it to read those articles. This helps me stay in touch with what\’s happening in my industry, making me more effective with my clients.
In my experience, many people use \”found time\” to check their email. While this may seem productive at the moment, it doesn\’t always move you forward on your long-term goals. When you really look at your goals, there are often tasks that would help \”get you there\” that take between 15 to 45 minutes to complete. Get clear about what tasks you can accomplish in 15 minute chunks. Then, always be ready with what you need to accomplish that task. You will immediately become more productive.
A good exercise is to make a list of 20 to 30 tasks you can accomplish in less than 15 minutes. I keep and update this list in Evernote all the time. This is not a list of to-dos, but rather the extras. Then set yourself up with the supplies or information you need to complete those tasks. Make sure the needed items are with you when you go to meetings, leave the office or otherwise suspect you might have a bit of extra time. By being ready, you can take advantage of these windows of opportunity.
One of my favorite uses of \”found time\” is to write thank you cards. Watching for people to acknowledge and thank also makes my day better. Plus, thank you notes touch people in a unique way. In fact, I write at least one thank you note each week. This means I send a minimum of 52 hand written — yes, always by hand — thank you notes a year.
Of course, I accomplish this by always having note cards, envelopes and stamps with me. When a meeting is late, I can quickly jot a note of thanks, pop it in the envelope and send it off. Expressing gratitude is a fabulous use of \”found time.\” Plus, saying \”thank you\” makes the recipient feel valued, sets you apart from the crowd and leaves you feeling good.
So my favorite strategy to being more productive is to always be ready. Take time to figure out how your day is likely to unfold and make sure you have the supplies you need with you. When you are always ready, you can truly get more done each day.
Jason W. Womack is founder of The Womack Company, a productivity-training firm based in Ojai, Calif. He is author of Your Best Just Got Better: Work Smarter, Think Bigger, Make More (Wiley, 2012).
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Jan 21, 2014 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
When it comes to being successful, high achievers have a number of habits in common. But that doesn\’t mean you can\’t be right up there with them.
Here are three qualities all successful people share and how you can make them your own:
1. Say \’no\’ to distraction. Every. Single. Time. Successful people make better use of their time because they are disciplined goal-setters. I’m referring to those high performers who experience no down-time. Sure, there are vacations and time spent with the family, but that comes after success has been achieved.
Successful people have that same list of tasks to accomplish as anyone else, but the difference is they make time to get them all done with no excuses. They may not enjoy it, but that is irrelevant. What matters is that it gets done. They are disciplined in planning their work and sticking to their plan.
Even when you’ve achieved that level of success, the work doesn’t stop. I am always on the lookout for a great, profitable investment. I might be out with my family, but my brain is always aware of business opportunities around me. I don’t just shut it off when I’m not at work.
2. Read something new everyday. Successful people read constantly, find mentors who can teach them and value new information that can help push them forward. Whatever field you are in, you have to learn before you earn. Learn your product, customers and competition. And then: keep learning.
3. Flaunt your failures like a champ. Fail as many times as you can. Everyone fails. It’s part of life. Too many people take failure as a sign it\’s time for them to give up. Those people don’t get very far. What sets successful people apart is the ability to get up and give it another go with a better plan for how to be successful the next time around.
If you want to embrace the habits of successful people, you’ve got to make the change within yourself first.
Reblogged from Entrepreneur Online.
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by Dr. Heléna Kate | Jan 19, 2014 | Dr. Heléna Kate's Blog
I don\’t know who you wound up hanging out with in high school, but it seemed to me that the Artists were heavy on imagination, vision, and dreaminess while the Jocks were about results, goals, and action. As I look at the people I work with now, I can see this classic high-school saga play out — the vast majority of either group rolling their eyes at the other. The Artists are weird. The Jocks are stupid.
Truth be told, I work with more artists than jocks. Artists tend to dream big and forget to wake up, get a cup of coffee, and take some action. Quite honestly, some artists get lost on the way to the coffee pot, never to be heard from again. When I start to talk goals or plans with them, all of a sudden they look at me like I\’m in an athletic uniform on the other side of that cafeteria — like I just don\’t get them or I am not one of them. In their mind, Artists do not work that way.
Jocks, on the other hand, might be very successful in their lives, but they feel empty on the inside. They got the job done, they scored the goal, and their team is giving them praise, but it just isn\’t giving them the same thrill it used to. When I start talking about vision, dreams and life purpose with them, they start noticing that I am dressed a bit funny and think that maybe I am a little too flaky to help them out.
However, what rarely happened in high school needs to happen in our lives. The Artists and Jocks need to hang out together — and even enjoy hanging out together. This needs to happen or we are not going to be able to bring our dreams into reality. If we have vision and no action, we eventually have frustration. If we have action with no vision, we also get frustration. When the Jock and the Artist figure out that they really make a great pair, we have some of our favorite high school movies — satisfaction.
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